Empty Nest Syndrome
last updated Thursday 11th November 2010 - 11:48
Women`s thoughts on an age old problem-empty nests!
As the count down to A level results starts, another batch of Mums and Dads will be starting to feel the emotional turbulence that comes as their youngsters eagerly await the start of Fresher’s Week at University.
Excitement mounts amongst the young, as it is time to flee the nest to their respective universities! Excitement for them but for some parents, it can be a time that they dread! With a feeling of emptiness looming, time on our hands, it hits.
Hello all empty nesters!
We, as mums, have gone through various emotions throughout their lives, from exhaustion when they were babies to exaltation when they received awards. Their first swimming badge to Grade 8 Piano perhaps. Recognition through school to frustration when the teenage years appeared. Back to exhaustion, sleepless nights, waiting and worrying for their return, when they finally have some independence, having ripped up the L plates.
We cannot wait for the days when the house is clutter free from them lounging around and leaving a trail of debris room to room – or so we think!
We cannot help but be mums who prepare their boxes of food goodies, for university, from first aid even to clothes maid (probably for the first time in their lives will they do their own laundry!) Come September, it is not hard to spot mothers and their young, filling shopping trollies, buying bedding, pots and pans, in readiness for their first flight from the nest. With experience, we mums can see and imagine both of their emotions!
Who prepares our box of emotions for when they have left and the bedroom is empty and life seems a little less busy or important?
Empty nest syndrome is just one more emotion that we as women and men have to deal with and now is a great time to make sure that it is not such a difficult one to overcome. It can be extremely distressing and unsettling, is felt by many so do not feel alone or embarrassed.
The best advice given – is to keep busy. Look at taking on adult classes be it day or night at your local college. Start planning now so that you don’t get in to the trap of saying you will do it once they have left. Too late! The courses will have started and may be filled up.
Join the gym and make a commitment to achieve a goal by a set time. Plan to take part in a fun run day of 5 or 10K next year, surprise the family.
Arrange to meet up with friends, other mums going through the same feelings, once a month or fortnightly for coffee or lunch.
Write a list of all the things that you said you would do once you had some spare time and do them.
Your children will feel happier if they think you are busy with life and it makes it all the more enjoyable when you do catch up. The conversation will not just be focused on them as you will be able to chat about some of the new activities that you are involved in.
Take a look at our article on adult classes for some ideas and how to get started.
Or join our forums, a great place to leave a message for likeminded women and have a giggle at the same time.
" Cakemaker" was looking for comments and support on empty nesting in 2009. If you are a student and feeling low, take a look at the messages in I cry every time I have to go back to uni
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